spiritual fitness

we just want to be loved.

       we all do.                                 

it's been this way for lifetimes really... wanting, needing, yearning... romantic love gets close... but even in the heat, and excitement, and flurry of being the single most important thing in someone's world... underneath all that yummy comfort... if we are really honest with ourselves.. is this aching yearning for something more... and that something more confuses us.. how can we wonder beyond being loved in a way that seems perfect? How can we be that screwed up?

Thing is, we are not screwed up when we touch this emptiness that lies underneath our perfect love.. we are finally touching our perfection when we get honest with ourself that there is something more than what lay outside of ourself....

Most people don't dig deep enough to even get there.. as soon as it is touched we jump away from the feeling as if it were a hot stove and our finger might get burned. We are so afraid to feel what lay beneath the layers of the feeling that goes beyond how the world thinks and feels about us. 

When we do, suddenly the chest becomes tight, the solar plexus locks down, our tummy twists in anguish... satisfying love, is something no one teaches us how to attain. That is why Valentine's Day is so cherished, it is the day we assess our value in the world.. our value  with another, society says so..Hallmark says so... we get red roses and chocolate, dinner's for two... union. Isn't that what we want, yes, union. And so when we do, why is it fleeting? Why do we need a day to say I LOVE YOU?

I think it is because we forget how to know I love you on the inside first, so we look for it on the outside. And the world tells us, the outside is very very important. For you will be measured in value and assessed in this world by how you present. Look at the magazines, size up the latest look and integrate, assimilate, copy and paste it upon yourself.. and the world will welcome and embrace you. 

Get busy enough and you will not notice you don't fit in with your heart and soul for the outward reflection makes sense to the world around you so you fit in and that is all that matters right?

I notice when I teach traditional group exercise classes. If I stick to the regular verbal protocol of "burning fat", "toning muscle", "shaping the body" type of encouragement... my classes "get me" and they get into their workout.. after all that is what exercise is for, right, melt what is unwanted, build more of what you don't have enough of, come exercise yourself into a better looking body. Is this bad? Certainly not. But, in class... I find that personally, I do not care about teaching about empowering the body so much in this way. So yes, there is a little of this concept of bettering the body parts to a degree.. but more often I like excavating what lay beneath our superficial layers of mind and heart. I find that intense cardio like indoor cycling gets one to the core of their emotions quickly. 

I find when teaching classes that create almost immediate exhaustion, people can't hold their "image" up and go that deep physically at the same time. As people in class would physically melt in sweat, their faces began to tell me a story about their deep seeded emotions. An empathetic energy rises in the room and as the work out gets more intense, emotions run higher, angers rise to the surface, loss, uncertainty, worth issues, pain body, self worth vulnerability... I can see veils drop that are otherwise in tact unless people are brought to the brink of being able to hold it together which indeed indoor cycling can crumble even the most impenetrable of image holders. 

As I taught these classes, I realized, this is a great time to rummage through the layers and get to the deep knowing underneath the layers of our worth and perception of our value in the world. No Hallmark holiday can reach into these stores. If we want to feel our value, we have to dig deep... underneath our image oriented self, is the self that needs no outside validation, it simply is. 

So in these seemingly conventional "spin" classes (indoor cycling)... I began to speak to the inner person... a language of empowerment, pushing beyond the obvious where we all meet and allowing the body to allow the inhibitions to fall away, when the frustrations arise from meeting such an intense part of ourself floats up from the push of going deeper into the ride, to allow it to come up. And what I found was that there is a lot of pain body inside us that exercise can get us to when we allow it bubble up. And under this pain body is bliss. And it feels euphoric to reach. Endorphins surge and float through the channels and eddies of your body. Suddenly we touch on a love that is not outside of us at all, but deeply inside of us... needing to be tapped like water running underground. This is only one way to reach the bliss of what lay beneath the obvious layers of your mind and heart... it is one simple way to reach your soul love. But when you reach this soul love, you deeply connect with the essence that this love you wanted on Valentine's Day is not going to come from someone outside of you until you can touch it inside of you.. And the deepest love, is not sitting just in the stores of your heart, although the heart is a catalyst for how the soul love enters into your physical, emotional, psychological and psychic body... your ephemeral body of your Soul is always connected to your Essence... your heart is the gateway way. There are many layers inside the heart center of who you are... and breaking through the layers of self protection is something that takes time. Why I love intense physical exercise as a means, is because it is so incredibly innocent in its approach. You just have to use your body to begin, and push it hard enough to push past your mental control. What I mean by that is the mind has a lot of dialogue in the beginning of exercise until you let go and the body keeps going but the mind can catch up anymore-- so it starts to fall behind, and slowly begins to give up because it can't keep up its chatter while the body is pushing so hard.. that finally the body leaves the mind in the dust.. when this happens, there is a sudden quiet for a little while, and this is the time when the heart gateway opens. At the gate, there can be a lot of suppressed emotions. Anger is a biggie. As  I teach, I can see that anger is one of the first emotions to pop up on the faces of my students, fear of failure is another popular vibration that comes into play. 

As I see and feel these emotions floating to the surface, I begin a new class dialogue. My indoor cycling instruction changes to a dialogue about fueling breath. Feeling the energy of empowerment to rise up in the body-through feeling the powerful confident, loving perfect self within. Encouraging each of us that this is our birthright, to feel and know this deep love within us, but we must have courage to let the lesser vibrations express themselves so the higher vibrations can fully flow free. Harnessing the trapped emotions and breathing through them instead of letting them defeat the workout, using the workout to allow them to rise up, but also provide an energetic exit so they can leave the body in a healthy and good way instead of getting trapped again underneath in that mysterious hard to reach place they get stored. 

As these feelings rise, and have a safe way to process and exit. I see a "glow" shift in my students. I can feel that love I know we all crave, rise up in their body in self confidence. I smile inside that this is a way to reach the soul love inside us. And although it is base and fundamental.. it provides a tool or a way into that realm where the love that we are remains not contingent on whether someone "Sees" us but that we "Feel" us, and when that happens.. the love that comes from us on the outside does not feel so vulnerable because we do not risk being destroyed by it when it changes form, or we are not loved as we wish.. We allow the outside world to change and grow because we have found ways to stay connected to the bliss that lay beyond where we get stuck in the fear, anger, hurt body that lay directly above the bliss body. We can pass through that fear body through our intensity in a safe way, and not be emotionally destroyed by it. Our image on the outside becomes a reflection of that deep inner radiance instead of something contrived off the popular trend of society's idea of style and standard.... to Something that is much more filled with grace.

A beautiful way to feel the love we all wish for is a work to experience what moving through the layers means, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. Dive deep into the willingness to swim into the waters of you, and the layers that have made you who are are for all time as you know it... 

Namaste, my dearest sisters and brothers... 

What lies beneath...

Layers... upon layers. You can feel it inside you when you are very quiet inside. In the stillness of your own inner realm... the reality of the layers of you silently creates of feeling of the many levels of consciousness existing within you all at one time....
Many of us, stay with the surface layer... the easily tillable soil I would call it... the immediate feeling... which presents as the "rational" way.. sound thinking... you know. Operating mostly without our feeling sensors.. but achieving a kind of practicality that helps us get things done.
Beneath that just slightly is the feeling center...layer. The unconscious directive of conscience ruled by the heart, that is influenced by our immediate surroundings, immediate past, or hopes for the future, also laced with our deep past brought into current circumstance. 
I suppose I would liken one to the sun,  as an image we understand as blatant and blaring, warm and safe, secure rational thinking about our directive. It satisfies productivity. Don't look too hard, you might miss the obvious kind of directive. The layer of making good sound use of your intellect, using your head energy. 
And the next layer, something like the image of the moon as it often represents our unconscious directive, something mixed with feeling,  unconscious hopes and fears, what we long for, and wish to manifest, and also our fears of not achieving what we most desire, empathetic knowing, extra-sensory and intuitive. Trusting your gut, instinctive. Using your heart sensor energy. 
And lying there in the next layers, our awareness of its existence based on the degrees of our own self introspection,  is a whole bunch of layers of the mixology of of both head and heart intertwined.  I would describe this as Earth we walk upon in our daily reality.. the ground we walk upon, the waters we swim in.. the changing weather patterns of our moods through the patterns of our daily life...the mix of the landscape that creates our everyday living breathing reality. Within this mix of head and heart, is both the intellect and rational of the head mixed with the empathic heart... Each a wild card of sorts, for both the head and the heart are a mix of our higher and lower vibrations. Our higher vibrations attuned to love and our lower vibrations infused with fear. The varying degrees of each that have been shaped by our experiences creates layers within us which for the most part are where our reactive energy comes from when we are sorting out how we instinctively operate in the world. As there are many layers here, some deeply imbedded  in our unconscious, the layers begin to communicate a  general operating system of a way of navigating the world. Our own unique mix of a combination of layers that creates a survival mode of sorts, a modus operandi. 
Underneath all this is a stream of all the unsorted debris, what I would call the fall out and the fire. The image of the inner core of the Earth comes to mind. A place where the yuck muck merges with the undeniable divinity we are within...  the great fires, the transformer, all in one, boiling for our ascension, boiling for our demise...we choose, yet when it arrives, no matter how hard one fights against it, it's Eternal power seems impossible to withstand, sweeps us inevitably into its throws and flows.  A place of volatile life force... so mighty we have built moats and layers so expertly around it to avoid the possibility of experiencing the reality of its existence until some experiential opportunity thrusts us in flight over its eternal fires. A flight where most feel the heat and find every possible avoidance to inaugurate themselves into the die cast of being consumed in these inner fires or transformed by them.   A molten boiling mix, the inner core of that Earth of our daily walk through life, and the sum of our karma we can no sooner conjure up for its fires rise in and of its own accord and timing. We feel its heat within our major life transitions, but its truest eruption comes in the form of our own kundalini awakening. 
For most, it lays boiling deep in the psyche,  transformation yet to behold, all the fires burn ready to transmute what is unsorted back into usable energy.  This river of  fears and angers mixed with pure love essence our Essential Self, is the transmutable self, the veil between worlds, where our highest and lowest natures churn awaiting integration, from unsorted influences that have become a part of our physical, psychic and emotional bodies that the other layers could not make sense of, yet remain unworked out, unhealed..only to burst forth with such intensity, when erupted, flows through all our energetic channels filling even the darkest back alleys of psyche with our Eternal power merges with our physical self. These fires burn all that is outmoded within us, seeking to transmute that which does not serve our Eternal Self. Our everyday self often experiences these burning fires as a mix of sheer terror, anxiety mixed with intense feelings of yearning for soul union, connection with a soul counterpart, sexuality, sensuality, often presenting soul connections of shared karma or mirror reflections to us of the very issues being worked out within our own process..often the very thing that drives you toward each other is the very essence you have come to transmute or slough off. So as these fires burn, feelings of deep aloneness, sadness, uncertainty of love, being loved, worthiness of love arise- coupled with intense familiarity toward the other, love unlike you have known before, intense knowingness of the other. These fires, match so many aspects of how we seek to be loved in the world as our sensuality bursts, expands, floods, our being. Often people experiencing these fires mistake the love, for opportunity to make these fires about this new discovered "other" instead of the journey it is meant to be in Self LOVE... unfortunately setting the self up for pain body and loss.. So within these fires of transformation, a focus of surrender is essential... If in surrender, when our lower natures try to latch on to what feels like the promise of love everlasting in another, we are gently redirected to the love, grace essence of our own Divine Self..where we resonate perfectly within our own bliss not based on another, perhaps enhanced by a divine counterpart but not dependent upon it, releasing the urge to lasso it as a guarantee that we are worthy of love, transforming it into the understanding WE ARE THE LOVE.... This love is a transmuting love that has come to burn away that which makes us feel separate from the "other" or that love exists outside of ourSelf. If we try to make it anything other than what it is, we suffer. The secret to surviving this internal volcanic eruption of so much intensity is breath. Knowing these fires are fanned and fueled by our own life force, yet they are integrated by our own life force as well, through our exhale. On the other side of this inner transformative fire is what lies beneath....
What lies beneath, lay BLISS.  Our kundalini fires bring us to our bliss, with its rise through our body this fire transports what feels like an intelligent energy that rushes through a mind blowing energy that pays no heed to our rational natures. Sometimes, this journey into bliss can feel painfully short...We must know and take comfort in the understanding that our Essential Self resides here always. It is a glimpse into our Divine Self. Experiencing this bliss, is our true reality. Sometimes people become pained in its transitory nature, but in truth, the more we align to allowing the fires to burn away false belief systems, distortions and schisms, the more the bliss flows as the river of Love that IT into all of our deepest channels and eddies.  This bliss... It is what I would call the Night Sky, the Cosmos, the All.. where the planets, moons and suns are not separate, but One.. Duality obsolete. The planes and dimensions unified, all possibilities One. Where the layers meld into acceptance and surrender so profound, there is not a schism mechanism to piece it out part and parcel. Eternal ecstasy, the fires of our kundalini burning up through every cell of the Universe, atoms spinning bursting to create more of ItSelf . The place where we remember all is unified, everything has always been One. Our place of Grace. Forever and infinite, our Divinity. Our awareness of this divine energetic aligned and perfect within us... all ways, always. Kundalini brings this essence through this fire into our bodies and transmutes all that needs healing. 
How do we get to this Night Sky within us where our inner cosmos is awakened to the birthright of our outer Cosmic reflection?
WE STOP.  Yes, I said, stop. Stop everything. Become silent again. Utterly still on the inside. Let go of micromanaging your path. Exhale, and let go of the reigns. Drop them and everything but what your Essential Self needs to survive. Say no to the doubt that creeps into to tell you this leap of faith will burn you up, the very heat you have covered up with layers of the mix of heart and head, and leap into your Soul. And your Soul will move through your heart and it will expand so wide, you feel the Universe stretch its borders so vastly the only thing you can do to manage such a strength and power in your body is to breathe. And so you do, and you take this great inhale of All that Is into your physical body and this head that rules the first layer, becomes dizzy with release, and the exhale that comes from this breath, begins to soften the tension of the rigidity a body that has been in the exclusive bondage of the mind.  And the heart rushes into the places in the body compassionately assuring that everything is going to be just fine, if you just keep breathing... And the heart and the head begin to work through all these layers together sorting things out, what feels good and what feels bad... Until great rivers of molten fire surge from your inner core in waves of kundalini fire gurgling up from the root of your being, fires of transformation, the sum of your karma mixed with your innate eternal essence to experience and know more of itSelf, erupts in a volcano of kundalini fires transmuting the very things you have avoided, hidden, made secret, into your ascended Self. 
The energy exhales and the bliss surges through. You feel the unity in your body of the Oneness you are... you feel fertile and expansive. Your breath increases inhalations exhalations, and it makes more of yourSelf. Your sacred sensuality oozes, yearning to produce, procreate, recreate, creation. And you are there, it may last a moment, it may last an eternity.. but it lay beneath you forever, constant, never knowing in and of ItSelf that you ever felt separate from IT. This intelligent force seeks only the go-ahead that your surrender brings, and It's treasure trove is eternal. Namaste. 

Divine Kiss, Wake up Sleeping Beauty

We all want to know our Divinity... It's true... I say it boldly because knowing this is our key to Self Love. We can not hold a state of Grace and not seek our Divinity, our unique and precious union with the All. We may not use those words or say it in this way because quite frankly-- talking about knowing our Divinity is quite often see as a heresy of sorts....

How did we get this so twisted, I wonder?... That our inner quest to know this vast Self that we are became tainted with misunderstanding and fears that is it ungodly to pursue?-- Fears so great, we no longer even allowed our thoughts, hearts and souls to wander into the wonder of our Larger Self.

And how is it that it is so collectively acceptable to ignore taking a curious peek into what it truly means to be part and parcel with this Omnipresent Infinite Force? How is it that we got so far away, from the very thing each of us needs most?

It is not a heresy to seek to know, awaken and remember you are a cell in the body of this Infinite force..and since you are created in IT's image... you are a reflection of IT's perfection... How is it we got so far away from understanding and embracing the LOVE that we are, when this is our birthright?

Sisters and Brothers.. it is time to Know ThySelf. It doesn't matter how long it has taken, or will take to fully remember this... it only requires that you are willing to see your perception different than whatever has kept you away...

You are Infinite. You are a creative force beyond your wildest hopes and imaginings. Throughout the entirety of your body, energy that is the Breath of All Life, runs in channels, meridians, highways of Qi, with the electricity that rules the Cosmos. How can you be fueled with this finery and not be perfect?

It doesn't matter what has happened to convince you thus far of what you are Not. It matters only that you follow this inkling that you are more than you would ever hope for.. that you are treasured beyond value you would hope to place upon yourSelf, you are more, more, more, exquisitely, More....

If you are ready to remember, it is time to learn how to exhale this electricity through your essence in the knowingness of all the Infinite possibilities you partake in every time you take a inhalation... for in this conscious breath, you invite the Divine into your body~through your energy channels~ and charge this body, this heart, and this soul that you are with the soul fire that is your unique vibrational essence, this necessary essential part of the All, which is YOU. It is not that Source is not running through your body until you realize it..but when you awaken to the realization that this electricity is Pure Love, all of a sudden the awareness of the vibration catalyzes an awakening within you of all that you are. You are filled with the light energy which is neutral until it is recognized and magnetized with a direction.. It is your recognition of what it is that co-creates how it will be in your body, in your heart, in your experience. Equally, you have the opportunity to take it in the opposite direction into fear, pain body, anxiety, depression, etc... The Universe is neutral, it resonates with everything from shadow to light, to that which is the void and yet to be formed as well as what has already been created. When you invite the essence of LOVE to show you all that you are... this intelligent energy enters your body and creates more of itSelf.. when you allow your fears to drive the energy, it seeks the same- to create more of itSelf.

Tuning into your innate wisdom, a yearning of sorts to know the LOVE that you are, the LOVE you will create more of, if you give it life, intention and focus, the Divinity of your perfect Self will come forward and manifest itSelf in your Life as an expression of LOVE, happiness, peace and harmony.

There is no time line for this awakening. The Universe is patient. But your soul is hungry.. thirsty.. as you open yourSelf up to truly, authentically committing to fully embrace the very highest vibration of who you are on all levels, planes and dimensions.. the Universe responds by reflecting back to you what that might look like on the grandest of scales...The Kiss of the Divine Awakens, Wake up Sleeping Beauty....

Die not on the Inside, Free to Believe...

"Be Yourself, Everyone else is already taken" ~ Oscar Wilde

The best... very best thing you have to offer this world is YOU. This post goes out to all the people hiding under the blankets of someone's else belief systems because the world didn't make it safe for you to show us who you are.. From the bottom of my heart, I offer my sincerest apology that somehow you were sent the message that being anything less than your entire Self was what the world asked of you. Some people have no idea what I am writing about, and to you, I say.. YaY for you.. You are blessed, truly.

Unfortunately there are many who have been taught it was not okay to be you.. You who believes as you do.. you who feels as you do.. you who has many faces of time, space, and dimension... Yes, you. Whatever this life has brought you in circumstances that has contributed to this inhibition in living your life, your beliefs or creations to your fullest and highest expression of Love.. I am here to tell you.. You are Free.. Set yourSelf Free.. Right here, right now, I proclaim release of the chains that bind, hold you back, lock you up inside . If the world, your world can not handle the REAL you.. I promise you this, the Universe will provide you with the support you need to create anew.

If you have been under attack because someone is afraid of your differences from them, whatever those fears can be.. It is a very oppressive energy to spiritually combat. I call this spiritual warfare.. It no longer has to be a battle in anger, fights, verbal squabbles, you no longer have to be a master of avoiding your personal truth .. as much as it seems there is no other way.. there is. For you are always free in your heart, even if your body is imprisoned, no one is captive of your Soul, no one can take captive of your heart unless you give it to them. Your body may be bound, your mind may be heavy laden, your heart burdened, but ...your Soul is always free.

So when you are attacked because someone feels they are somehow protecting their beliefs by influencing yours.. know that although war may be waged against you, your Soul is free to soar.... And if you are LOVE, no matter how unloving, insensitive, or mis-aligned someone can be in trying to "help" by influencing your precious beliefs, ... if there is a way, in this life, your Creator will find a way for you to live what you love, even if the only way you are offered is in the confines of your Heart. The key is not to lose Heart, it is all too easy to let go in an attempt to be practical and safe. But if you suppress yourSelf.. you will find as you may have already found, you begin to die on the inside... Finding this your beautiful blossoms may have already suffered wilting.

The only truth I have ever found to be constant is LOVE. If the energy is not based in love.. differences matter not, in fact are beautiful, if we are focused on that Love...Living that love, why would we ever place our focus on what is different than what is similar? I sense we would be a lot closer to a unified world in peace if we placed our intention towards this end.

So how do I find freedom even though my life circumstances show me I am bound.. or expressing my personal truth causes unrest with the ones I love... How do I act free, live free when as soon as I do, something happens to show me that it is very unsafe to BE MYSELF?

Everyone has different circumstances. Because of this, there is no way to speak into all the possibilities which bind, and how to break free. What I can teach you is some skills which will help support you so you can empower yourself to find the place inside you to begin to feel what truly being free to be you fully feels like....

1. Breathe. Have you ever noticed when you feel shut down either by your own influence or someone else's, there is a pretty good chance you are holding your breath?mmmmmYes, you took the breath in, but did you let it out? Probably not. You most likely held on to it for way too long..and when you finally let it go, you probably let it out in a measly little way. If you want to begin to feel your Essence, feel your personal power and strength, the fastest, most efficient way is to begin breathing deeply, slowly, fully, in and out. You are going to take that in breath, we all do.. but how long does it take you to get around to letting it out, and when you do, how much breath do you actually let go of... This is so key.. Most of us don't come from a cultural background that understood the how vital breath is, not only for opening our energy channels, but for our body's own health. In fact, so true is this for so many of us, even reading the suggestion, most people want to run in the other direction. Breath is your energy fuel. It fuels your life force through your body, it reconnects you, grounds and centers you... Filled with this vitality, you will begin to untangle the webs that bound you in the first place.

2. Move, Shake, Dance. MOVE YOUR BODY. When we feel bound, our energy body creates layers of stagnant energy around our body that inhibit the beautiful essential breath to set you free. When you choose to BE YOURSELF.. that is ultimately the first step toward the intention of truly experiencing the freedom of what it feels like to live Free and BE YourSelf. Fueled with breath, you begin to feel lighter, and often, suddenly look lighter, heaviness leaves your face, bloat leaves your body, one the surest ways to lose weight, is to move your Qi. And you move your Qi with breath, and movement.. I teach a Island Body Harmonics class where our focus is first on breath and second on shaking, moving, ecstatic dancing, letting the body move without feeling inhibition..and you know what? People start to glow! One woman went from a size 20+ to a size 12, in just a few months. Everyone asked her how she lost so much weight.. and she said, "the only thing I have done different is Body Harmonics".. She had so many beliefs from her family she had herSelf all bound up in their expectations, their religious views, their mis-compassionate (misplaced compassion) ideas of how she needed to live her life, she got stuck, and the weight, stuck with her. When she began to breath and added movement, allowing her breath to move through all those "stuck" places, the layers she no longer needed, dropped. Another lady, coming for inner peace, lost 16lbs in the same time frame .. by not setting the goal just to let go of weight but rather to live their truth, loving themSelves... They let their dreams and beliefs become a living breathing energy that took on a life of its own, literally!

Last but not least...

Dream, visualize, meditate, pray. Seemingly different words, intricately linked, as they are rooted in connecting to the highest part of ourSelf in the Divine. Imagine the person you are on the deepest levels, in self love and empowerment, that you have been holding back from the world. No matter afraid you have been over the fall out of allowing your personal perception of what you belief to shine out to the world around you.. Now is the time to bring forward your best Self only you can first imagine yourSelf to be... Dream big and realize the greatness that you are.

Using the healing techniques of breath, movement and visualization, you will find a renewed sense of Self. No longer will anything or anyone that has instilled fear in your unique expression of the all encompassing you, hold you back. Believe in your Divine Right of Freedom.. Thrive on the Inside! The outside will show the miracles of you within...

From my heart to yours~

Ali

New Harvest Moon

The New Moon's void is upon us once again... A unique cycle which begs forgiveness.... the old hurts, sharper edges...impetuous reactions.. wish to find a new way. Yes, this is what the stars and planets set the stage in our experiences to align to.. Feelings brewing like a cauldron of healing herbs...like a soulful soup that will warm even those hardened places in our hearts where we have forgotten that love's waters dried and we don't even remember why...

But this is your time.. your time... to allow the mishaps, mis-communications, mis-placed compassions, misunderstandings to gently seep up to the surface.. for the time of healing griefs and pains which were not given the freedom to express themselves in the highest vibration are seeping up from their dark cob webbed corners, pouring out from their over stuffed trunks, and seeking to be transmuted into use-able energy again.. Those unhealed parts that are outmoded and no longer useful will begin to stir and churn.. inviting you to find a new way... a better way... a peaceful way....

The thing is.. the most fantastic beautiful thing is.. healing past is not contingent on reliving the hurt, hashing up the old for review so your ego and intellect can decide if there is worth or value in letting it go... See.. the value is in allowing it go regardless if one has earned your forgiveness.. whether or not the hurts are mended, or if you have earned your own forgiveness.. whether or not you understand it... it does not require your analyzing or your ego's imput... but it does require one thing... It requires your Surrender... Yes... We are talking Free Will...

When working with clients on release... I have seen so many miracles over this one small realization. You do not have to be ready.. but you must be willing.

LET IT GO.. give it back to your Creator in a simple, heart felt way.. Be willing to admit that you do not know how to heal these pains/hurts.. that you may not know how to be ready...but are willing to be MADE ready.. which happens through your Surrender. The amazing thing about letting go.. giving this back to the Essence that will heal you, brings in the mirror reflections to give your experiences to match this healing through your joy now into of through pain.. Yes, you will have new experiences that will show you that you do not have to hurt to heal this.. you do not have to have your greatest fears presented to you so you can prove yourself now strong enough to face it better this time.. The lovely part is that it is no longer about conquering it, it is about being presented with better options that reflect a kinder, gentler scenario... with the qualities that are smoother and softer within you and in the people who you will be working through these healing issues with..

Does this mean, I think in the next month all your deepest shadows will be arising for healing awareness to blow them out of your energy field? Smiles, NO.. It does mean that this New Moon reflects a surge of support for the healing to begin.. And just as the moon waxes and wanes, tides rise and fall, so do our own cycles of healing. So tonight marks a beginning on whatever level your mind, body and spirit are ready for to initiate and welcome a new cycle of healing for you..

Remember to Surrender into its possibilities by offering the helm of your life journey back to your Creator.. and you will begin not only a cycle of healing but of many new beginnings.. These new beginnings flourish as you continue to let go the the reigns .. Life will flow, and you will feel the peace of stepping into the support of the Cosmic highway...

So let the unraveling begin..

Namaste~ Aloha~ Oceans of Love

Eyes of Time

There is nothing you have missed. Everything that is yours comes to you... your great LOVE awakened Soulfire that burns within you knows its counterpart.. Know this as real.. has always been real and remains So.

Wait not for what you think you may have lost, lingering in but a memory... All that is yours is forever yours.. It has left you not.. it remains part of you.. not all of you..a mere building block...pieces layered upon pieces, mirror reflection begging for healing.... aspects of the whole of which you are in your entirety.. shadows and light filters through timeless distortions, laden baggage, in need of understanding, refining, forgiving, a smoothing of layers..light lifts out of shadow like cream separates away from the milk and floats to the top.. so your light aspects seek your own rising, lifting out of the heavy burial clothing of your dimmer realities and into the light gossamer veils readying itself for lifting in sacred chamber of your Heart...

For you are a masterpiece delicately entwined with the Other.. layers of your past, falls away~ that which you have wished to be All could never fulfill, for parts can only remain parts, matched in fracture.. what is like unto the Other is known upon its arrival.. without hopeless desire, it simply is.. .. only an empty dream of loss has such expectations, for missed opportunities and misplaced longing.. what is All of you has always been and always will be...it simply IS... Be not stuck in the shadows of what you have wished for.. time has not alluded you.. you have not missed anything.. Be in your now.. Forever you have longed and wished.. over forgotten dreams, missed opportunities, unrequited love, misunderstood, and unrecognized you have waited to be seen.

Now you see you have been but asleep, under layers of time.

Gently the awakened presence of your Soulfire seeps through the windows of time.. Your eternal flame can not be squelched or smothered by your mis-alignments and fractures.. As a temple fire, it is fanned and fueled by your Oversoul... Patiently, your Essence finds you through the channels of Time... gently reweaving your tapestry, repairing your distorted threads and healing your fractures..

Forget not you are a budding blossom in the winds of time.. Your petals stretch out far beyond where your mind seeks arrival... but into the far reaches of imaginings wild and beyond your every desire..

Know that your roots sink deep into a fertile earth pulling you inward... your trunk stretches outward to the great sky beyond.. your branches reach in yearning hunger for the light that begs pour its liquid nectar sinewing sensually down through channels that thirst to be drenched greedily with its light...

You stand solemn, sturdy and strong through the portals of time. Your Essence, limitless unbounded by time and space, complete, unified, One beloved.. One heart, One Soulfire eternal are you...Embrace passion filled, the kundal heart that burns the forever eternal Flame of Union....

Awakening the Sleeping Giant.. within

Within you lies the most powerful being sleeping under all the layers of experience that makes you, YOU. For centuries, like a sleeping beauty, your true nature's history/her-story gently awaited a precious time when all the layers of the time-continium melt together in an integrated place.. where your hurts, your joys, and all that is you join together in one big burst of energy. Your "spiritual alarm clock" goes of to re-awaken the Divine Self within.

Perhaps not everyone on the planet is exactly in this place that you are, but you ARE. How do I know this? I know because you found this writing. This was written for you to read, for you to find...You know who you are, and those not intended for its discovery will not be drawn to read...This writing is waiting for all the sleeping GIANTS.. yes, giant. You are a spiritual giant...an extra-ordinary loving being who came to anchor love on our planet at a time as the world shifts into a vibration that is so ready and in need to the powerful energy you bring. You hold and anchor in Great LOVE.. so that we can move into these changes collectively..

Many moons ago, you made a contract spiritually to wake up when the world was ready for you to remember the LOVE that you are. The most riddling part of this agreement is that most people who made this agreement forgot they made it.... For many, eons, centuries, decades have passed feeling fractured inside but not knowing how to repair the pieces.. feeling lonely for love, desire to feel empowered but feeling as if an important piece of the solution was just out of grasp.

I realized my life path and reason for sharing my intuitive gifts is recognizing these sleeping compassionate Spiritual giants..and helping them to remember who YOU are, who for so long have anchored a silent peace on our planet... waiting the Great Remembering. These powerful people are usually the ones who have contented in allowing, supporting, strengthening other people's journey instead of focusing on forwarding themSelves...compassionately holding space. And while all this support was perfect for its time.. NOW is your time.. this is your time to find the mighty and magnificent Soul Fire that burns within you... Intuitive are you.. perhaps in a quiet way.. but your inner compass is yearning to have its voice once again returned to itSelf... The time has arrived for your heart to again be your guide. It is your time to say "Thank You" to your mind.. who has thought its way through the ways of the world, analyzed your outcomes, forging pathways, finding solutions built on sound reason. Time is now, to find a proper place for this well organized machine, your Mind, re-arranging priorities so you can place intellect back into its aligned place, which is in your tool box and not at the helm of your ship.

Everything you need to know is not contained within this first message, for this is merely a soft and loving wake up call.. an inner calling of sorts but in written form to say.. "I SEE YOU" .. and the time is now.. take my hand when you are ready.. I am here.. in spirit, in body and in heart.. so much loving heart...

My love to you, Sleeping Gentle Giants, spiritual masters remembering your gifts, your empowerment, your Self Love, and most importantly, the divine Grace ever-flowing with in your Magnificent Hearts...

Your Soul Fire burns in an Eternal Flame~