Kelp Goddess~ Sea of Grace

A goddess from the sea am I..... 

Today the water was rough and sharky looking. The sea called me home, dusk was upon me but I had to jump in... but then I saw my fins looking anxiously up at me, and my mask and snorkel yearning for a salt water dip as much as I so I grabbed them thinking, I will jump in ...and quickly out. 

But the water is my home..and as the waves crashed upon the rocks, she lifted me into her waters and my feet quickly became fins. 

At first I was apprehensive, it looked dangerous to swim alone. But as soon as I donned my mask, the underwater aquarium, my inner truth suddenly matched my outer reality. I was HOME. 

The kelp forests swish in sync with my swaying body as I glided through the smokey dusky waters... the fish surrendered the the rushing tide.  I had to give in and let it take me or I would helplessly struggle against a thrashing sea. Surrender. Surrender. Surrender. The Kelp Goddess does not fight the flow.. She gives into the pull. She feels her inner tides merge with the outer tides and becomes ONE. 

How can we be At-One-ment with ourSelves if we fight the tides?

I love the play on words that atonement and 'at-one-ment' suggest. In a way atonement for me means, atune-ment, align-ment, becoming One with Everything. A Kelp Goddess is not separate from herSelf, she is not separate from anything. When we give into the forces of nature, our atoms dance wildly in ecstatic fusion desiring to make more of themSelves. There is an excitement for the cosmic intelligent energy to run through our veins, and run rampant with creativity. 

There is a place in nature where you feel this way... So what is your Kelp sanctuary? What part of nature makes your cells ignite and burn like molten lava so there is nothing your mind can hold on to-- but to just let go-- give in -- and be taken?

Have you no idea what I speak of? If nature has lost its luster, you have gotten caught up in a life that has lost it's Divinity. The very essence of Divinity is overflowing in the alive-ness of the nature the abounds around you. If nature has become a stale back drop, you have gotten stuck in the mud of the mind. 

Breath will set you free. Your breath of Life is electricity waiting to make love to you in your body. When your breath becomes sacred, the air around you feels alive. It can't wait to enter into your body's cosmos and procreate a new YOU. It sounds sexual, yes? Nature, breath, my cells in some kind of promiscuous activity-- a seemingly bland mixology. There is nothing bland about pure life force. It is bursting out your seams when it is fed with your inhalations of the intention to invite the Divine into your Body, and exhale that perfect Glow out into the world around you. Use your breath magnetized with intentionalized love to ignite the co-creative fires of your Essential Self that seeks to know you through the physical realms. Allow nature to do its part as the air around you becomes alive, as soft as velvet as you drink in its sweet nectar into the cells of your body. Know the sustenance of Self comes from your Breath, enlivened by nature and driven into each cell of your essence. The three become one.  

In this, you are electrically charged to create yourSelf anew. Any which way you choose. 

Create Love!

Namaste Beloveds

(image created by the loving hands of Me and my Mama)

Grace.. in Death Shock

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gkfLms4KQ_s&feature=related

How do we say good~bye when we keep expecting the one who has left us to walk through the door? 


Loss is empty... your skin crawls... you want to change time... go back... say something different... say anything at all... You want to not be frozen, in this new time, Without what you feel you are looking for.. this emptiness.. What to do?


My friend died... I couldn't help him... I always helped him... but this time... he didn't let me...he killed himself. 


At first I was beyond devastated... now... I realize it was his time... Like any other death, even suicide is perfectly timed.


We don't want to accept what seems avoidable as perfect do we? It seems un-natural to accept. It feels like betrayal to accept. 


But if we let go... embrace what has happened as part of a bigger picture of what is meant to be--something changes. Peace enters in. 


Releasing attachment to sorrow seems/feels like a betrayal to the loss. As if... you accept it, somehow it makes it okay. And yet, accepting it DOES make it okay. Therein lies the healing.. and with that ok-ness, there is an exhale and release that no longer do I have to hold tribute to the pain as a loss... suddenly instead of loss... I began to feel the celebration of a life... I began to feel as if my life mattered more on a second to second basis. That his life was over yes, but in a way, a new facet of my could begin. I could choose different. I can choose to appreciate the tiniest of things again. I can stop rushing. I can stop  feeling so addicted to productivity. I can dream of a future that death can not. I can choose to do it differently than my friend. I can live in the moment co-creating future possibilities in the now. I can love him for helping me to look at my life different. I can carry him in my heart in a new way... in a moment to moment way instead of a passing thought kind of way as I did when he was living. I can strive like he did to master something great. I can choose to love and know that I am love and that every moment matters. 


The shock of death is like a stun gun. It is easy to hold an alter of grief and pain. It may even be necessary to... but at some point, it can also be a catalyst to LIVE. It can be a spark to love with more expression, and better communication of what is real to you. We can not live in tomorrow and yesterday is gone forever... We can not reclaim what we have lost in the same way... but we can build it anew... We can choose to see our relationship with this person in a new way... Instead of the physical, a pathway in the heart opens and our soul connection to this person pours through. In our allegiance to our grief, sometimes we miss the opportunity to allow the new way forge itself a new expression. We miss the gift of what the loss has offered because it isn't packaged in a way we wish to recognize it. We want what we know. We want what we can touch. We want to hear a voice, touch a hand, we want their body, their mind, their heart to be just they way we know it. Yes, we do. But many things can happen which may never happen until someone has left this world. In death we can create community. We can ignite passions for those who are living by what has been left in their footprints and carry it forward in  ours. Look to the footprints of the one who has passed before you... stand in them, and feel as they gently dissolve under your feet ~~soon the footprint will wash away underneath your feet. And what you are left with is your own two feet, yes, but carrying the essence forward of the one who walked before you there. Take up part of their journey into your own path, it is yours now, not theirs.... but it carries their essence-heart-intention, and forge ahead, carrying what they left for you to carry. Good or bad, painful or joyful, what they left for you, is yours to carry forward. It's your canvas now, carrying a part of their heart inside of you. You have been touched in an irrevocable way~ this essence does not leave with the dying body... it becomes a part of the LOVE that you are... and the love that you share as it begins to swim in the oceans of you. You will bring the beautiful essence of whoever you lost, forward into a new world through you. 


How lovely. 


Grieve but know you carry the Great Heart of your Love through You. 
Celebrate the wisdom your loved one has imparted. 
Inhale their holy essence into your Body. 
Let it fill you, heal you, calm you, love you. 
Exhale now this essence back to the world in a way only you can do. 
Breath the Breath of Life of Your Love Forever.  
You have not lost, you have gained. 
Yes it has changed. Change is good. Did I just say that death is good? Yes, I think I did. 
Let death, change you. Let death, not separate you-- rather, make you more full in ways you never thought possible. 
Beloveds~ I breath life unto you... 
Namaste